bARTer Sauce Trade: Holy Souvenirs Batman!

The Sauce did a trade recently with Jessamyn. She rules. She once traded me a brain scan. OF HER BRAIN! What? Yes, it's completely true.

This time she came through with what I call: Holy Souvenirs Batman! It's a bunch of little religious medallions. I like 'em. Even though I'm not religious. They're pretty and the thought behind them is nice. They came in a pretty red, velvet box.

And I must say, I'm pretty proud of my photography here. I like the maroon next to the aqua blue. I like the medallions spilling out of the box. In general, I just like them I guess. There, I said it.

And if you don't agree - leave a comment here and I'll send you some examples of my first attempts at taking pictures for my Etsy shop. Wow. They're really, really terrible. So I guess I'm just saying -- I've learned a bit in the last couple of years.

In exchange, Jessamyn got a carnival horse made from sequins on black velvet. She seemed happy about it.

If you're wondering what the heck this bARTer Sauce thing is - read on:

bARTer Sauce is an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Whatever I get, I trade for something else -- and everyone I trade with has to tell me a story. I document it all on my website.

Now, trade me something.

Newest bARTer Sauce Trade: Mondo JubJub

bARTer Sauce's added a new trade to the family of currently available objects.

I gave Nik (a frequent Sauce trader and proprietor of scary-art.com) a painting I called "Proud Green Boobs" and a huge metal bra to cover some huge boobs that I call "Full Metal Bra."

He gave me this painting called "Mondo JubJub" and a book called "Aku Aku: The Secret of Easter Island."

Read Nik's answers to my "interview" questions.

"What's bARTer Sauce" you ask. What's bARTer Sauce?!

bARTer Sauce is an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Whatever I get -- I offer up for trade for something else. And everyone I trade with has to tell me a story. That's pretty much the poops of it.

The bARTer Sauce website is no longer Orange and Green

My wonderful husband, Doug built me a new website for bARTer Sauce for Christmas last year. Today he finally finished it (Eh-hem. Snicker). I designed the last website. It was orange and green. There is nothing more that we need to say about that. The new site is built in Drupal, a database driven, open source, content management system that is perhaps a close second in the "love of my life" competition. Doug's first. Always. Now I just need to post all the trades I'm behind on due to website launching excitement! Check back next week for a whole passel of new available trade items -- including a figure drawing book that originally didn't include any penises on the male forms. Someone went through the book and drew a penis on each male figure. Then -- a puritan went through and made underwear on many of the men with white out. It's quite possible the weirdest thing I've ever seen. Well. Maybe not.

Eight Weird Things

Shower Art - Don't put it in your Facehole

It's Shower Art. Don't eat it.

Don't rub it on your body like soap.

Don't wear it like a belt buckle.

Just hang it in your shower and giggle once a day.

And...if you can tell me what's wrong with the Shark Week Shower Art -- you win a prize. But only if you're the first one to figure it out. Leave your guesses here as comments.

Rock on.

Have a super Tuesday.

Four Weird Things

My Girl Crush on Betsy

The cutest lady in the world just traded me "Lord Bratnose" for the Glitter Cats. Betsy cans things. She cooks. She's adorable. She sews the most amazing skirts. She has a super cute blog. She has a super cute Etsy shop. And another super cute Etsy shop. She embroiders things with scary twin ladies who can explode birds with their minds. See. Cute. Cute. Cute. If Doug and I ever considered Polygamy -- I think Betsy would be one of our top choices for second wife. What? So anyway, here's the crazy beaded eagle on black velvet that Betsy-face traded me for bARTer Sauce. Did I mention Betsy named him Lord Bratnose? I have no idea why. What's bARTer Sauce? It's an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Whatever I get -- I trade for something else and everyone I trade with has to tell me a story. I document it all on my website: http://www.bartersauce.com. And now -- we have a Facebook Fan Page. "Who doesn't," you say? Well, yeah, that's a good point.

New Shower Arts...

Some new Shower Arts for your viewing pleasure. Go ahead: waste your Friday. Waste it.

bARTer Sauce EXPLODED

For some reason there has been a renewed interest in bARTer Sauce, my experiment in trading for art and odd objects. The idea is that whatever I get, I trade for something else. And everyone I trade with has to tell me a story. This past couple of weeks have been a whirlwind of trades and trade offers. Ba-zang!

Here's what I got from Will recently (click on the links to read the stories that came with each item): 

A Russian book (Will got Wedding of the No Face Couple in Exchange)

A French Telephone (Will got Terror for Terror in exchange)

This Weird Orange Cross with stuff smooshed into it all over (Will got the Stuffed Dooky Kiss in trade). This cross also came with a somewhat heart-wrenching story about a man named Phil who advertises his "skills" on matchbooks. 

And finally, the pride of pack 314: A trophy shaped like a totem pole commemorating the 1979 Cake Bake. Woot! (Will received a slightly broken Hugs for Jesus statue in exchange)

I'm afraid I had to make an example of Will. You see, many times people I'm trading with send along "extras" with their trades. Things that are odd, yes, but that now I have to deal with. You see, part of the idea behind bARTer Sauce is that I trade for odd things -- BUT THEN I TRADE THEM AWAY -- to other people. For them to enjoy (translation= "deal with"). 

Will was no exception. In fact, the trophy and the book were not sanctioned trade items.  So here's what happened (and what will happen in the future to all Sauce traders who send me "extras"): I "punished" Will by sending him one bARTer Sauce item (of my choice) for each "extra" he sent me. At first Will did not understand this punishment and set about trying to tell me what to send. He did not understand at all. 

You see, this was an opportunity for The Sauce. An inventory overhaul opportunity. And I took it. Will received the Hugs for Jesus statue, which, while hilariously named, is not all the wonderful to look at -- now especially since he arrived a bit worse for the travel and was in several pieces. 

Enjoy Will! Enjoy!

Balderdash Winner & New Contest

Last week I ran a contest for the funniest definition for the word Zazzera. Kayla from The Eclectic Element  made me laugh very hard with her answer: 

Zazzera: Noun,

1. A popular new wave of dance moves where you thrust your butt into the air and sidestep like the north american crab.

Warning: Best not used under the influence.

Ex. I walked into the club and when the music came on, I made like a crab and did the Zazzera.

Congratulations Kayla! You'll be getting a cool surprise package from me in the mail.

Now for a new contest. This is from the last game I played with a group of friends. I'll give you all of our answers for inspiration. Then, you leave your own answer as a comment to this post. The funniest one gets a surprise package of indie craft goodness from me.

This one is a movie called Wide Open Faces. I googled for images with the phrase "Wide Open Faces" and got the one above. Enjoy.: 

1. A big, mouthed soda jerk takes on gangsters at a vacation resort.

2. An unintentional comedy, Wide Open Faces, consists mainly of people yelling, "Spaces or Faces?" "Places or Faces?" and "What?". It went straight to dvd. 

3. A circus movie about deformed performers who travel the world. 

4. A documentary about the world of competitive eating.

5. The horror of dental malpractice is exposed.

6. A quack surgeon attempts to make a face wide enough to be carried on the wind.

Now it's your turn. Leave your comment on this post with the synopsis for the movie, "Wide Open Faces" and the funniest one will hear from me next Friday.

Now, remember to check out Shower Art - waterproof art you can hang in your shower with a suction cup - and bARTer Sauce - and experiment in trading for art and odd objects. You'll probably be glad you did. And if you're not .... well ... um ... who cares.

Happy Friday.

Vintage Video Game Paintings

bARTer Sauce normally trades everything that comes through the inventory for something else. I made an exception once and just gave something away. For charity. Don't judge me. I make the damn rules people. I make the rules.  My friend & ex-roomie Val is involved with SketchFest and they had a fundraiser. I had lots of drinks at said fundraiser. 

At one point in the evening the auctioneer said he wanted to try something different. He told the audience that we could offer up services or things that we own to the other people at the fundraiser. If the thing got a bid of a certain amount -- then we kept going. There were all kinds of cool things -- like for example, I got grant writing help from Brett Fetzer for $75. Worth every penny. 

I offered up the receipient's choice of any bARTer Sauce item I have in inventory. 

Yes, it's true: I'm sure no one had any idea what I was talking about. 

Yes, it's true: I bid on way too many things. 

Yes, it's true: Val liked her paintings. Can't you just tell by the look on her face?

Val came to pick up her item at the last First Thursday Art Walk. She chose two paintings by Sean Leary that both have a kind of 80's video game theme. Awesome!

What's bARTer Sauce?

It's an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Anyone can participate as long as you tell me a story. Check out everything that's currently up for trade.

bARTer Sauce 7 the Empire Carpet Man

Remember him? Empire Carpet?

588-2300 emPIRE!

I remember him from my college days in Peoria, IL (I know -- you feel for me. You should). Those commercials would always interrupt The Simpsons.

Now, bARTer Sauce is the proud temporary owner of TWO Empire man Bobblehead dolls. 

One is in pristine condition in the original box (not that that will ever matter under any circumstances) and the other has been ripped free of the original box that it was so carefully shipped in because I had to see what it looked like -- and quite frankly -- I wanted to play with it. Mind your own damn business.

Ever wonder about the history of Empire Carpet?

Me neither.

Curious how Empire Man made it into my hot, little hands? 

Read Sean's story.

Read Sean's answers to my "interview questions."

bARTer Sauce is an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Everything I get -- I trade for something else. And everyone who trades with me has to tell me a story. I document all the trades and stories on my website: bartersauce.com.

Check it out.

Trade with me.

NOW.

Do you love free stuff? Me too.

My pretty friend Betsy did a pay it forward-ey thing on her blog the other day. She said if you left a comment she would send you something awesome in the mail.  I LOVE getting things in the mail. So so much. So very much that I send out letter upon letter to friends who rarely write back (you know who you are you monsters) just so that I have HOPE (however slim) that someday I will get something great (or not great - I'm not picky) in the mail.

I order things online (can you say http://www.etsy.com) so I'll get neat stuffs stuffed in my mailbox. And I've devoted the last three years or so of my life to bARTer Sauce - a project that ensures I'll be getting interesting packages from all over the country. I'll do anything for mail. INCLUDING giving away neat stuff myself. That was the only requirement from Betsy - if you get something from her you have to make the same pay it forward-ey offer on your blog. So here it is. If you want a special surprise in the mail just leave a comment on this blog. Then, send me a link to your blog post offering up free surprises to others and you'll get something in the mail from me. What will you get? It's a surprise - but it might be one of my Tater Bot cards. Maybe - just maybe.

Testing out my new iPod

This crazy thing let's me post blogs!!!! How freaking cool is that??? Discuss.


And I just figured out how to post pictures. I don't think I've ever been happier.

New bARTer Sauce Trade

Lookie what I just got for bARTer Sauce.

Yes, it's a flying Pee Wee Herman skeleton guy with a light-up crotch. How on earth did you get that on the first guess?

Amazing.

I traded it to Nik from http://www.scary-art.com. He got a fancy mask. Read about our trade.

Did I just hear you ask, "What's bARTer Sauce?" No? Oh.

Well, bARTer Sauce is an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Whatever I get, I trade for something else -- and everyone I trade with has to tell me a story. I document it all on http://www.bartersauce.com.

Hang Art in Your Shower

with our help.... New Shower Arts:

I'm SICK -- but Look What I Got

I sneezed yesterday at work and all of a sudden, I'm completely sick. It was weird. For the past few days, I've felt like I was fighting something off and I think that sneeze was my last chance to rid my body of whatever was trying to get in. My body lost and now I'm in my jammies doped up on all kinds of decongestant and cough syrup. I apologize in advance if this blog is "wackier" than normal. And now...the bARTer Sauce update:

bARTer Sauce is an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. The basic idea: whatever I get, I trade for something else. And then I trade that thing for something else again. And on and on. The only rule: everyone who trades with me has to tell me a story. About anything. Just a story.

First Jen -- I call her Jen Snuffalupagus because she has a really long last name and I can't pronounce it. She traded me these two pieces for a giant painting of a pigface.

Here's us making the trade at my studio: Then Tara traded me one of the Twisted Tree t-shirts that she designs and screen prints for a painting of a two headed boy. Here's us making the trade at the EtsyRAIN show in Kenmore.

And finally, the vintage, tattooed farting duck that I got from Nik for a Red Screamer. Here's the awesome farting duckie:

Heck yeah! If you want to trade for anything you saw here, visit bARTer Sauce, create an account and send me a trade offer. There's more available for trade than just what you see here. Check out the full list.

New Shower Arts for You to Look at and Stuff

We made some new Shower Arts recently...Enjoy.....and you can see more at Ugly Baby.

Look What I Got

I call it "Super Bright Kisses" for reasons I think might be obvious. I recently did a bARTer Sauce trade with a nice lady named Laura from my EtsyRAIN group. She makes pottery and stuff and sells it in her Etsy shop: LAS Designs. You should buy one of her mugs. I have two and I drink coffee out of them all the time. I highly recommend coffee -- and Laura's mugs. Read Laura's story that came with the bARTer Sauce trade. Read about the trade. Here's some pictures of Laura's super-cutie-potato-face son who came to the trade too and seemed obsessed with Shower Art. He's a winner in my book:

Here's Laura and I doing the trade at the September First Thursday Art Walk in Pioneer Square. I always stick my tongue out for the first picture for some reason. And the second shot is where I go for moderately normal. If you would like to trade me for "Super Bright Kisses" or anything else that is currently available through bARTer Sauce, get in touch -- rosalie(at)bartersauce.com. What the hell is bARTer Sauce? It's an experiment in trading for art and odd objects. The only rules: Whatever I get, I trade for something else. And everyone who trades with me, has to tell me a story.