9:55 AM

What Can Unanimous Craft Do For You




The question I am asked most often is, "What the heck is Unanimous Craft?" My best short answer is that Unanimous Craft is like Yelp for the crafty community.


I thought I would identify some tangible things you can do with Unanimous Craft to help your small business (and a few things you and your small business can do to help Unanimous Craft.)


THE BASICS
What is Unanimous Craft?
Unanimous Craft is a directory of resources for indie business. People can create listings for resources that they find useful -- and that they think others would find useful. These resources are tagged and organized on Unanimous Craft to make them easy to find and discover.


What are Resources?
Resources can be lots of things: a video tutorial, an excellent blog post, websites for suppliers, indie shops, your own Etsy shop, your blog and your friend's blog. Anything that is related to the crafty community or that might help you run a small indie business.


WHAT CAN UNANIMOUS CRAFT DO FOR YOU?
Increase Your Google Ranking
You know how people are always telling you that you need inbound links - Unanimous Craft is great for that. What's an inbound link? Any link from an external website that points to your website. Inbound links help to increase your ranking in Google searches. If you have a bunch of credible sites linking to your site - you move up in the search result list. Hot damn!


How do you do it?
Get Feedback from customers
Ask your customers to review you on Unanimous Craft. They will need a user account (to prevent people from stuffing the ballot box) - they, when they visit your page they will see a button that says, "Review this resource." After clicking on that, they rate you from 1-5 stars and then write a review. These reviews move your resource up and down in the popularity contest. The five most popular resources are shown on most pages of the site - including the front page.


Promote Your Individual Blog Posts
When you write a blog post that others might find especially useful, add it as a resource on Unanimous Craft.


Use Tags to Group Stuff
Use tags on your resources to group them together. If you have a street team, ask all your members to add their Etsy shop and include a specific tag that identifies your street team. Then, you can give everyone the url for that tag and you'll be able to see everyone's resources in a big list. For example, our Seattle street team is EtsyRAIN. We had our members create listings that included the tag: etsyrain. Now, when you click on the tag "etsyrain" on any listing, you see the entire list.


You can do the same thing with everyone's Facebook fan pages and blogs - and use the resulting list to follow everyone in your group. It's a great way to get organized without YOU having to update a million documents.



Write Reviews
Each time you write a review, your profile picture shows up in the upper right corner of the Popularity Contest page. This links to your profile on Unanimous Craft. This is especially good if you are a Premium Member and have an expanded profile.


Make Lists
Make a list of your favorite resources, or resources that share a common theme. You could make a list of all the yarn shops in your town, supply stores in your area, shops that buy handmade items on consignment, members in your area's Etsy Street Team or vendors in an upcoming craft show. The options are pretty much endless. Once you have created your list - share it with others by posting a link to it in forums or sending it to friends who might be interested.


If you create a list of awesome websites that you want to post in the Etsy forums, make the list on Unanimous Craft and then link to it from the Etsy forum post. That way you can tag your list to be found in Google searches and add a paragraph or two about you and your shop to the description of the list. Check out this great list of places to advertise and promote your shop as an example.


WHAT CAN YOU DO FOR UNANIMOUS CRAFT?



Make Yourself a Resource Owner
Set yourself up as the owner of a resource. This connects your resource with your profile on Unanimous Craft. Your picture will be shown on the resource page under the heading "Resource Owner."


Become a Regional Craftologist
In exchange for reporting on crafty events in your area, you'll get free advertising and other benefits. To apply, fill out this Regional Craftologist application. Get more details about the requirements.


Become a Premium Member
For just $60 for a full year of membership you get access to some special benefits. You get a more robust profile that gives you the option to link to your shops and social networking sites, front page features, discounts on advertising, special attention from yours truly and a shout out several times a year in Twitter #FF posts. Read about all the great stuff you get.


Advertise
Help support Unanimous Craft by advertising your own shop or blog. Rates are recalculated on a monthly basis determined by site traffic. Currently, one month of advertising is $30 for regular members and $20 for Premium Members. Check out the details.


Tell Your Friends
If you have crafty friends, tell them about Unanimous Craft. Recommend our Facebook Fan page to your friends. #FF our twitter handle: @unanimous_craft to your followers. Blog about us (and grab any of the images off our Share the Love page), add a sentence to your follow up email for orders that asks people to review you on Unanimous Craft, post links to lists or resources that you think are great in crafty related forums.


THANK YOU
I think that about covers it. The Intermediate Level at least. Thanks for making this project such a pleasure to work on. It's takes a lot of effort - for sure - but it's also really, really fun.
1:33 PM

Urban Craft Uprising, Winter 2010






Okay, so to say that I went a little over board at Urban Craft Uprising is putting it lightly. For sure. It can't be helped though. When one sees a bowl supported by ceramic baby arms, one has to purchase it immediately. Kniffin Pottery. They're neat.

I was vending at UCU -  selling Shower Art with Mr. Gale - so I didn't have as much time as I wanted to wander around all the booths. I did make sure that I took several quick passes through everything and that afforded me enough time to at least spend twice what I had budgeted so I guess I actually had more than enough time to look around.

Urban Craft Uprising is my favorite show. Hands down. Crafty Bastards and Crafty Wonderland (next weekend in Portland) are tied for a close second (only because they both involve travel). Oh, wait. But then there's the Renegade shows. Ugh. Okay. They're all so good.

The first day of Urban Craft is my favorite day of the year because it's the day when I know there will be another whole day of Urban Crafting.  Yay~! The second day of Urban Craft is the saddest day of the year because I spend the whole day thinking about how it's almost over. Sniff.

It's a great show in many respects. It's well run and organized. Everyone really seems to sell tons. There are bazillions of people around (9800 this year!). Great vendors are selected through the jury process. Lots of help from volunteers. Crafty book author signings. Crafty demonstrations. And this year - FOOD vendors! Yay!

Normally the concession stand at the Seattle Center Exhibition Hall is open and food sales aren't permitted. This year no concession stand (What? No pretzels and hot dogs? Okay by me!) and instead there were vendors selling awesome soups (5 different kinds each day!), cookies, candies and breads. I had soup from Got Soup? both days - Pumpkin Coconut Thai soup on the first day and Chicken with Wild Rice on the second day. Both delicious!

Here's my one piece of constructive criticism: The food was on one side of the room. The tables were on the other side of the room. The soup bowl was really full. I had to walk my soup through the crowd to get to a table. Dangerous. I made it - but not without yelling, "Hey, I've got soup here. Watch it!" a couple of times. Luckily it's a problem easily solved by either moving the food or filling the soup bowls less full. One of those solutions has to be devoid of red tape and bureaucracy. All that said, there were probably tables right next to the soup that I just didn't see. Let's not remove that from the realm of possibility, okay.

Our two days were filled with inspiring, creative vendors and the nicest customers ever. A friend of mine came by the booth and exclaimed, "People are waiting in line to buy art!" Pretty cool. Pretty darn cool.

Some Stuff I Bought:


Oh my. I got a handful of these "You Shitty Cat" cards. How could anyone resist? Well, anyone with a cat anyway. Especially my cat.

I plan to give them to my cat for every holiday. (and if you're looking for a really loud, annoying cat - please do let me know!)








These are made by Kyle of Power and Light Press. She is in the process of raising money on Kickstarter to build a mobile print shop in the back of an old delivery truck. Help her out.









My awesomely hilarious friend Moxie  (who is also the President of Urban Craft Uprising) wrote this book, I Felt Awesome.

It's super Funny. Perhaps - and I do not say this lightly - the funniest craft tutorial book ever written.

Moxie is not the most excited about shameless self-promotion which is why it was super fun to buy her book and wait in line to make her autograph it. Bbwwwwwahahaahahahahah! Squirm!

Awesome!


This is Moxie.

She is obsessed with needle felting. For reals. She makes fantastic needle felt sculptures and sells kits so you can learn how to needle felt too.

It's like she's sort of the needle felting champion of the world.
If that kind of thing existed.








More Stuffs I Bought and People I Met: 

Emily from Tako Fibers: http://www.takofibers.com/

Texture Clothing: http://www.textureclothing.com/

Tender Loving Empire: http://www.tenderlovingempire.com
Tiny Boat Sculpture by www.cartoonmonster.etsy.com

Old School Stationers letterpress calendar: http://www.oldschoolstationers.com/

MeMe Cosmetics: http://www.memecosmetics.net/

Bag from Xobruno (who inspired me to start framing my embroidered doodles) http://www.xobruno.com/ and my new Urban Craft Uprising apron.

This is for reals the best soap in the world. Estrella: http://www.estrellasoap.com/

Awesome headband from Schmancy: http://www.schmancytoys.com/

Vegetable bag from Wonder Thunder: http://www.wonder-thunder.com/, Truffle Sea Salt by Secret Stash Sea Salts: http://www.secretsalts.com/ and Crewel embroidery kit from Tako Fibers: http://www.takofibers.com
7:53 AM

Crafty Bastards - The Vendor Edition #2

Let's go over a few of the peoples I had time to meet during Crafty Wonderland.

Artist, Robert Ullman from Atombombbikini.net was there. Finally, something at a craft show I can buy for my husband thet he'll really actually totally like. In fact, whenever I ask The Mister if there is anything he wants -- he says, "Bring me back something with boobs on it and I'll be happy." Finally, I was able to make his boob dreams come true.





I also met Diane Koss from Cutesy but Not Cutesy.

I was walking by her booth and did a double-take because she had a bunch of plush monsters with horns that looks sort of similar to this artier monster with horns that I recently purchased at Schmancy (the worlds best vinyl toy and plush store right between my job and my house).

Mine has the Boston skyline on its tummy and has a tiny red bird on its horns.

I fell in love with it. Anyway, when I saw the similar monsters at the show, I was like, "hhhheeeeeeyyyyyyyy, are you....?" And she was.

It was great to meet her and I was pleased that I could recognize her other work based only on her style. 








 
I was doing my 50 mile an hour walk through everything (Well, I would have been if it had been possible to go that fast. Really it was more of a shoulder to shoulder jello wiggle-on with the rest of the crowd) and saw the girls can tell booth out of the corner of my eye. 

Sara Selepouchin's diagrams on tea towels and notebooks make my heart flutter. And the fact that they are hand screenprinted makes them even better. Do you need to know the anatomy of a banjo while you're doing dishes? I submit: yes, yes you do.


I even got to meet some Etsy folks while I was there - which is always like meeting someone famous... or - just someone who is way cooler than you.

Morgan and Julie were nice to me even when I made repeated trips to their booth to demand more raffle tickets for my customers.

Thanks ladies!





My last purchase was a pair of earrings from The Broken Plate Pendant Co.  I love posts and can never find them because everyone else seems to love dangles.

Juliet even helped me pick out the best ones when I couldn't decide between two pairs.




 

It's such a cool concept too. She breaks plates - and turns them into wearable art - earrings and pendants. It's a great way to honor those vintage dishes you've been collecting for no reason whatsoever.

They're gonna break someday, right?

When they do, scoop up the pieces and give Juliet a call.


 

And that ends our travels through the wonderland that is Crafty Bastards. Again, I highly recommend that you go.

For reals. You'll love it.
12:06 AM

Crafty Bastards - The Vendor Edition #1

So by now we're all familiar with the wonder that is Crafty Bastards in Washington D.C. but let's get to know the handful of vendors that I was able to talk to while I was there.






#1 Let's talk about Caitlin at Rebound Designs. I put out a call on Twitter to see if anyone had an extra table I could borrow and she was kind enough to answer my plea.

Thanks Caitlin! You have to be a special kind of nice to drag an extra table to a craft show.

Caitlin invented the Book Purse - which is - exactly what it sounds like: a purse made out of a book. I can't think of a better way to create a memorial to your favorite book that might be fallin' apart.


#2 McBitterson's - Tasteless Wares. They were our awesome booth-mates (who also have a really awesome website). Sadly, it was so busy that we didn't really get much of a chance to talk - but it was obvious to me - even without much convo - that we share a similar sense of humor.

McBitterson's makes fantastically sarcastic things with paper and plush.

The giant plush cigarettes with little frowny faces were a big hit. "He's sad cause he's a carcinogen!"Bah-ha-ha!

Figured out while we were there that I had actually seen them at another craft show -- in Madison, WI at the Sixth Annual Summer Craftacular. Neither of us live there. How weird is that?



Jennifer Cooke and I must have shared some sort of florescent pink day-dream obsession. I saw her booth out of the corner of my eye while I was trapped in mine taking everyone's money (mmmwwwahahahahahahah!)

The show was almost over when I HAD to bolt over there and check out her stuff. She prints in multiple colors (one of them florescent pink) which makes for an effect that I personally love. I ended up with a shirt and a bag (I almost had to fight another woman for the bag).


Check out r a e b u r n  i n k if you have also been dreaming in florescent pink.

Also, if you're into making stuff yourself, check out her book Design Your Own Tees and try out some of the printing methods.



I love my purse. So do others. People comment on it where ever I go. So go get your own and quit eyeing mine.

And thus concludes the first edition of the Crafty Bastards vendor highlights. Look forward to edition #2 coming 'round the bend.

8:58 AM

Crafty Bastards. Lived it. Loved it. Can't Wait to Go Back.

Dear 10 people who read my blog: If you do nothing else in your little lives, please make a point to go to Crafty Bastards in Washington D.C. at some point.
It's amazing.

It's live changing.

You'll love it.

You'll weep.

From happiness.

Normally I review shows and talk about the things they did right and give some pointers for what they could do better next time. With Crafty Bastards I am hard pressed to find anything they could improve. It is honestly a HUGE, huge, huge and really well run show.

Let me give you an example: we were in a shared booth. You get a booth-mate, a tent, two tables and four chairs with the booth fee. When we arrived at the crack of dawn to set up, we didn't have any of those things in our booth space. Doug asked one of the volunteers and in 15 minutes we had all of the above along with a visit from the festival organizer who apologized said she hates it when anything goes wrong. Super smooth.

So we set up, 30,000 people arrived and handed us money and then we tore down. It went by so quickly that it was just a big blur. I guess my only wish is that I had been able to meet some more of the vendors. It was just too busy to talk to anyone for more than 30 seconds. Crafty Bastards does have some vendor events, but they are earlier in the process and don't work for traveling folk like me. If there was an event for vendors either the day before or the day after the festival then traveling folks could attend. That's it. That's all I can think of that would improve this event.

Crafty Bastards is pretty much perfect. There is also still time to vote for Ugly Baby (me) in the Craftiest Bastard contest. Today is the very last day. Do it.

Location:Valley Ave E,Sumner,United States

8:25 AM

Washington DC - day one ( the non-Crafty Bastards day)

Stumbled upon this cute antique-ey slash vintage-ey slash design-ey shop called Skynear Designs. It's a personal rule that I must enter any building that has a large cartoon thing climbing up the side. So we went in. Within 20 minutes I had fallen in love with 3 or 4 things that cost over $900 on sale so it was time to leave.






We headed to the Textile Museum based on the recommendation of pretty much everyone in the crafty world. It was just okay in my book. This was probably because we walked over a mile in the hot sun to get there and then discovered that all but one room is closed due to some construction. Booooooo. What we saw was fantastically beautiful and I would absolutely go back for more if I'm in DC again in the future. I can also say, without a doubt, that the woman manning the front desk was perhaps the genuinely nicest person I have ever met. It's probably worth going just to see how nice someone can actually be.




Then we headed to the obligatory Abe thing. He's big. Real big. And you can't climb on his lap (in defiance of what my co-workers told me).




And here's the reflecting pool-ey thing next to the Abe thing.




And one more reflect-ey pool thingie.




We were milling about at one point and Doug said, "You pick where we go next." Moments later, we walked past this yarn store. And when I say we walked past it...I mean we went right in. Looped Yarn Works is on the second floor. And it's filled with yarn. Delicious, delicious yarn. It just so happened that they were going to Crafty Bastards as well. I couldn't buy anything because I have a huge ottoman full of yarn that I have to get through first, but the folks there were totally nice and talking with them made me even more excited for Crafty Bastards.





We ate at Teaism twice. In two different locations. Delicious. Try the salty oat cookie. It's delicious. DELICIOUS. D. E. L. I. C. I. O. U. S.




And finally, Albert Einstein. He's big. And kids like to climb on him so it's difficult as hell to take a picture of him without some little kid you don't know ruining the whole deal. He's big. And bronze. But his texture kind of looks like poo. A little. No disrespect. Just a little honesty.


  
 
And that, my friends, is the end of Day One. Washington, D.C.  

8:00 PM

Vote for Ugly Baby in the Craftiest Bastard of 2010 Contest

You all know Ugly Baby is the biggest bastard of all time. Vote for us in the Craftiest Bastard 2010 contest. Doug and I will be traveling to Washington D.C. in a couple of weeks to sell Shower Art at the Crafty Bastards Craft Show. It's my birthday gift to myself. Standing outside in a tent in early October. I love myself. I do.


Vote for us and we might win some stuff and give you some of it. (we won't though because we are bastards.)








7:19 AM

bARTer Sauce Travels to Sacramento, CA

Some of you probably already know about bARTer Sauce. It's my experiment in trading for art and odd objects. Whatever I get -- I trade for something else -- and everyone I trade with has to tell me a story.

The project was supposed to last for one year, but it's been over four years at this point and it is still going strong. I have made hundreds of trades with people all over the US, Canada, Mexico and the UK. I've met some crazies and some people who have become friends for life.

This year, one of my favorite Sauce Traders, Nicolas Caesar, approached me about doing a bARTer Sauce art show at Side Show Studios in Sacramento, CA. I thought it sounded like great fun. I would ship the items in The Sauce that are available for trade (21 at this point!) and Nik would display them and also handle any trades from the Sacramento-ers.

I had huge signs printed with the stories that were submitted with each available item. Some of the past Sauce traders shipped their artwork to display at Side Show as well. It's gonna be a blast!

Are your heart strings tugged? Well, I normally pay out-of-pocket for all bARTer Sauce expenses: shipping, printing flyers, advertising, etc. but I am hoping to get some folks to chip in to help ship bARTer Sauce to and from Sacramento and cover the cost of having the signs printed.

I was just accepted for a Kickstarter campaign. They are awesome. It gives you a platform to do funraising. People make pledges and then if you meet your goal, your project gets funded. Yay!

Help me meet my goal of $500 and get some cool stuff in the process!
10:06 AM

6th Annual Summer Craftacular, Madison, WI



Naomi Richardson from The Glitter Workshop puts together one heck of an event. I attended the 6th Annual Summer Craftacular in Madison, WI on Sunday, August 15, 2010. It's always so nice to meet in person the people you interact with and admire online and Naomi was no exception. She obviously put a huge amount of work into planning and coordinating this show. Nice work, Naomi!

 
The brief deets: 
  • It's an annual show. 
  • Approximately 80 vendors. 
  • This was the sixth year (hence the name: 6th Annual)
  • Location: Madison, WI 
I talked three of my family members into going with me and I let slip on the drive that we were going to be there before the show even opened. I explained that there would be people waiting in line to get the 50 free swag bags that they give out to the first attendees. They were very skeptical that anyone would bother to wait in line for a craft show. They got to eat their words when we pulled up about 20 minutes before the doors opened and there was a good 20 people in line already. 10 minutes later, the line extended down the parking lot. Take that, family! Regardless, we got there early enough to secure our swag bags. Phew!

The venue was awesome. Might I say: Super Awesome. I might and I shall. I did. Super Awesome.

The one potential downside with a spot like that is that the vendors were split up into three areas: Upstairs where you first enter, downstairs and outside by the waterfront. I don't think it was an issue for this show at all. There we were big signs directing people to go downstairs and the volunteers greeting people at the door made sure to tell everyone to go downstairs to see the rest of the show. I had no problem at all finding everything. Twice.

The downstairs vendors had a great view of the water and the outdoor vendors were right on the water front with another stunning view. A view so stunning that I probably should have thought to take a picture of it. I didn't. Live in wonder, people.

The vendor selection was varied.  The only areas that I thought were over-saturated were cotton a-line skirts and - the ever present in the over-saturated category - jewelry.


The pricing was crazy.
I'm from Seattle so I admit that I don't have a clue when it comes to the Madison, WI handmade market and what kind of prices it can support. I admit that. But some of the items were priced so inexpensively that I know the vendors can't possibly be paying themselves for their time and effort. Raise your prices Madison. Especially if you're selling online -- double your prices. Do it now.

The swag bags were pretty darn good. 
I didn't look at my swag bag until later in the day, and on a scale of 1-10 I would give them a 6. The contents were pretty good and the bags themselves were awesome. They seemed pretty heavy on business cards and promotional cards. I did get a full-size homemade caramel apple and a back issue of a crafty magazine along with a few pinback buttons and other tiny samples. The swag bags themselves were awesome and screen printed with the logo of the show on the front. It was honestly worth getting there a little early just for the bag itself.

In my humble opinion, it is much better to even have cheesy pens or magnets with your business name on them than to just include a business card or coupon. At my house, the business cards go in a box until enough time has passed and I no longer feel guilty about getting rid of them. Most people probably trash them right when they get home.

Coupons are really hard to use because, like I said, I didn't open this bag until I had left the show and I'm less likely to look up each shop online because the stuff you make isn't sitting right in front of me - tempting me. If the coupon is for use during the show people will have a hard time finding your booth. Or they will be too lazy. Or they will buy something from you and only realize after they get home that they could have saved money. None of those are good options.

Best case scenario, you'll have to tell each customer that there is a coupon in the bag and then watch them dig it out. It DOES give you a great opener to start a conversation with someone who walks into your booth so in that respect it's great. For example, Lulu reeled me in by striking up that very conversation. She said that some swag bags had a coupon in them for a free surprise. I dug around in mine and produced the official document to get my free dealie.


The pros: 
  • We had something to talk about. 
  • I got to choose from 3 different things so I got what I wanted instead of just a random swag surprise. (I got a needle felted mushroom pin. Awesome!)
  • Because she gave me something, my animal brain told me that I owed her. I decided to buy a little felted hedgehog that I had been eyeing but probably would have talked myself out of (how many needle felted hedgehogs does one girl need? Answer: more than two). My animal brain probably would not have had that reaction if I had just found the mushroom pin in my swag bag.
The cons:
  • The same thing could have totally been accomplished by setting a rule that the first 20 people to come in your booth get a treat. Then you still get all of the good stuff but without all of the digging through bags.

Something else I should mention here. This was a good sized, very nicely made felted hedgehog. I assumed it would be around $50 but I soon learned that it was $12. It's not enough. Raise your prices. For reals.

I got to meet OrangyPorangy in person, too. I've been an admirer for quite some time and own a few of her pieces. I found her originally from an ad in Bust Magazine. I was hoping to be able to make it to her new shop: Zip Dang in Madison - but I had some flight delays that shortened the length of my trip a bit. Rats!



The Purchases: 

I ran into one of my favorite artists at the show which was a happy accident since she is from Chicago: Laura George. I have a couple of her prints. One that I have hanging up at work instructs you on how to enjoy a banana. It gets many comments from co-workers. And another I gave my husband says, "Take your pants off." I have seen her work on Etsy and also in the coolest toy/plush store about a block from my house: Schmancy.



While Laura and I were talking, I noticed that she had a few original pieces with her for the show and decided that I had to have one. I was deeply saddened to find out that she doesn't take credit cards. There was an ATM on the premises (a huge plus for a craft show!) but I had just transferred to a new bank account and wasn't sure if I could remember my pin number. I decided to take it as a sign: if I remembered my pin, I would buy the painting. If I couldn't I wouldn't. I did remember my pin, but my transaction either would have run the machine out if money- or something else went wrong and I could not get cash out of the ATM. Laura and I agreed to do the transaction later over Paypal and she agreed to ship me the painting.

It does go to show that if someone really wants to buy something from you, they'll find a way to do it even if you don't take credit cards. But you really do miss out on all the people who are making a spur of the moment purchase. Vendors across the land: do yourself a favor and sign up for credit card processing today. When I made the leap with Shower Art, my sales at shows tripled immediately. I promise - it will pay for itself. Sign up with Propay. They are by far the cheapest and easiest and just charge you a yearly fee and a % of your transactions.

I also met Shawn from Bonny Goods who was kind enough to help me find a place in the area to have lunch with my dad: Michael's Frozen Custard. Here she is with Day enjoying their kozies. Yay!


Walking through the booths outside, I stumbled across Beth at Green Cricket Salvage.


One of her paintings caught my eye. It was probably the glitter and tiny astronauts that did it. I ogled it from afar and then from right up close and then I looked at the price: $25. Say what?



I snapped it up and would have happily paid twice that without blinking an eye. It's called "I don't know Bob, This looks a hell of a lot like Wyoming." I love it. (picture courtesy of Beth's blog post: cafe collection.)


I was amassing quite a collecting of finds and needed a new bag to put them all in - a bag that I could use as my second carry on at the airport (This is how I rationalized it to myself at the time). That's when I spotted Jim at Jimbot.

 
He sells really cool screen printed tote bags with his original artwork appropriately priced at $35. He doesn't take credit cards, but by some miracle, I scraped together enough to buy a bag with the number 3 and a robot on it. It reminded me of my husband, Mr. Gale because number 3 is his favorite number. James: Sign up for Propay. Now! Now! Now!

In conclusion: I had a great time. I bought too much stuff. I loved it. The end.
10:09 AM

Slappy Cakes - The Extended Version

Dear People,

I think I have already told you about this magical place: Slappy Cakes. It is in Portland. Now, your next question will automatically be, "Where in Portland? What neighborhood?" I cannot help you. You see, I was born without a sense of direction. I do not drive. I do not think about where I am in relation to the larger world. I do not know what the neighborhoods in Portland are called.

I do know this though: The Internet exists and by telling you the name of the restaurant: Slappy Cakes and the word Portland - you will be able to find everything you need.

Here is the most important thing: Slappy Cakes is a restaurant where your table is a griddle and you buy pancake batter by the squeeze-ey bottle and make your own effing pancakes at your table. 

SHUT UP!
I know.

I've been there twice. The first time I went, there was no one in the place but us. The next time I tried to go there, people were lined up outside waiting to get in. I should really stop telling people about this place but I just can't help myself.

These are my friends, Tim and Merritt. They were kind enough to drive me to Slappy Cakes at the crack of dawn. Look how excited Tim looks! p.s. Merritt has a baby inside of her.

This is my friend Marlo. She is also very excited!

This is the table that is also a griddle. Look at Merritt's belly!

We arrived with these other people - literally the moment they opened for the day.
My first pancake attempt. MONEY!

I go for the flip.

I bungle it.

I think this pancake was too complex for my first try.
PAC MAN!
BOOBS!
Unrelated, but these two Slappy Cakes customers cracked me up because they looked like an old married couple reading together at the table, but one of them is 5. Ha!

The end. (Tim wanted less kissed and more PANCAKES!!!)